11 Ways to Fight Anxiety

We live in a fast-changing, unpredictable, and, at times, simply overwhelming world. In a way, anxiety is a perfectly logical reaction to the chaos. Sometimes, all you need are some simple, effective techniques for reigning in those anxious feelings. Here are a few that have worked well for my clients over the years.

The Emergency room breathing technique 

If you have ever checked into the emergency room with a panic attack, this is the technique the doctors likely used to get you back to normal. It is called “boxed breathing” because it relies on the simple method of “4-4-4-4”. This breathing method engages the parasympathetic (calming) nervous system and will bring you back to normal in a matter of minutes.

∙ Breath in for 4 seconds,

∙ Hold for 4 seconds.

∙ Breathe out for 4 seconds.

∙ Hold for 4 more seconds.

∙ Repeat for 3-4 minutes or until you are calm.

∙ Note: If you become anxious regularly, it is good to practice this breathing method on a regular basis when you’re not experiencing extreme anxiety (as part of your daily meditation routine, for example.) This way, you can use the technique effectively in a pinch, when it’s most needed. This is particularly useful for folks who have PTSD; if they have a surprise anxiety attack, they can immediately practice boxed breathing to calm them.

∙ A simpler version of this technique is: “4-8”: Breathe in for four counts, and out for 8. An advantage of counting your breath is that it keeps you focused and prevents your mind from wandering too much.

∙ How does this work? When we breathe in, we activate the sympathetic nervous system, which readies us for fight/flight. When we breathe out, we engage the parasympathetic nervous system, which automatically calms us. So the longer we breathe out, the more our body responds in a naturally calming manner.

 Alternate nostril breathing 

This is another highly effective breathing technique that can create calm almost immediately. To practice alternate nostril breathing, you can follow these steps: 

• Sit quietly in a comfortable position with your spine straight and shoulders relaxed.

• Close your eyes.

• Bring your right hand up to your nose.

• Place your thumb on your right nostril.

• Move your index and middle fingers out of the way.

• Gently squeeze your index and middle fingers together, and your ring and pinky finger together.

• Exhale slowly and completely through your left nostril. 

• Close your left nostril with your ring finger. Inhale slowly and completely through your right nostril. 

• Repeat the process for several minutes until calm. 

Create your own “Anxiety Mantra” 

A mantra is a time-honored way of repeating a simple word or phrase.

Create a mantra to use in anxious moments. Some examples: “I got this,” “This too will pass,” and “In 10 years, this won’t even matter”. Come up with some mantras that are particularly meaningful to you, or that fit a particular event that you know will be anxiety-producing.

∙ Before a difficult test or challenge, think of 3 times when you succeeded. These can also become your mantra. For example: “I won the swim meet. I aced Calculus. I made honor roll. I can do this.”

Mantras have also been used in traditional meditation for centuries, and most popularly in Transcendental Meditation. By quietly repeating “Aum” (Hindu), or “Om mani padme hum” (a Tibetan mantra), you can enter a deep meditative state that many people find highly calming and beneficial.

“Externalize” your anxiety

When you externalize your anxiety, you perceive it as a thing that is different, separate, and apart from you (“externalization” is a term used by therapists). You can say to yourself: “My anxiety is NOT me. It is something apart from me that I am learning to deal with.” Remember: You are much more than the feeling of anxiety: You are a multi-dimensional person with unique talents and skills, and you have MUCH to offer the world. Do not minimize yourself with the tiny, limiting label of “anxious.”

"Calm Peaceful Place" visualization

A "calm peaceful place visualization" is a mental exercise where you imagine a place that makes you feel completely safe and relaxed, allowing you to access a sense of peace and tranquility by picturing details like sights, sounds, smells, and textures from that space, often used as a relaxation technique to manage stress or anxiety. 

Key points about a calm safe place visualization:

1. ∙ Personalization:

This place can be a real location from your memory or a completely imagined space, depending on what feels most calming for you. 

2. ∙ Sensory details:

To enhance the experience, focus on engaging all your senses - what do you see, hear, smell, taste, and feel in your safe place? 

3. ∙ Stress reduction:

By actively visualizing this calming space, your brain can trigger the release of calming chemicals, helping to reduce stress and anxiety. 

Examples of a "calm safe place":

∙ A serene beach with soft sand and gentle waves

∙ A cozy cabin by a fireplace

∙ A lush forest with sunlight filtering through the trees

∙ A peaceful meadow with wildflowers

∙ A calm lake with a gentle breeze

Yoga and the benefit of physically decompressing 

Yoga calms us by engaging the breath and body (yoga literally means “to yoke” or “unite”) to calm the nervous system. By focusing attention on the breath and places in the body where tension and energy are stuck, we can achieve a level of relaxation that is transformative. Yoga has such a powerful relaxing effect because we typically carry our stress in our shoulders, neck, back, and lower body—and stretching gives us a way to release this accumulated stress. Incorporating yoga into our daily or weekly schedule can make a profound difference in our physical and mental well-being.

Physical exercise in general is a great technique for ridding our body of excess tension. Before a test, presentation, or any other stressful event, set the time aside to do relaxation exercises: yoga or stretching, meditation, or progressive relaxation techniques. You may even decide to go for a run, or do some other aerobic exercise for 30 minutes, to get the dopamine and endorphins pumping. Lifting weights is a great way of burning off tension and anger. These techniques will help to give you the clarity and calm you need to better handle the situation you are about to encounter.

 Anxiety is the power of positive action

Think of your anxiety as the fuel that will energize you to greatness. It’s the force that energizes you to engage in the adventure of life. This isn’t make believe: the right amount of anxiety actually increases our focus and attention, so that we can bring  focus and concentration to the task at hand. In other words: Imagine if you were presenting to 200 people, and you were slow, apathetic, and didn’t care about what you were saying; your words would lack the urgency, force, and power of a sharply focused delivery that a little stress can bring. So be thankful for your stress. And use it propel you forward to complete your mission!

Put the world on “pause”

If you are engaged in a mission-critical task, remind yourself to focus on it solely, without anxious distraction. For example, if you are taking a 10-minute meditation to calm your nerves, first say to yourself: “I am meditating for the next ten minutes. This is essential in order for me to relax. The world can wait for me for 10 minutes. Then, I can return to my work, feeling refreshed and energized.” You can apply this technique to any kind of task—allowing you to engage in a highly focused flow state without being distracted by anxious thoughts. You can also do this when ruminative thoughts wake you in the middle of the night: Put them on pause, so that you can get a good night’s sleep (You can visualize yourself pushing a big “pause” button and your thoughts stopping.)

Change what you can. Accept what you can’t.

It is a given in life that many things—most things, in fact—are beyond our control. We find ourselves worrying endlessly about the “big” things—macro-events like the pandemic, world politics, global warming. But there’s not much we can do about them.

In these cases, we may want to focus on the things that we can control. This gives us a sense of “agency”; it helps us improve our personal situation in real, practical ways, and gives us a feeling of power.

For the things that our outside of our sphere of control, however, we can practice acceptance. Change, “bad luck”, and unpleasant people and events are a permanent feature of life’s package. Accepting them does not mean we like them; it simply means that we are perceiving them as a very real part of life—as opposed to hiding from them or denying their existence. We can work on acceptance, rather than complaining about the unfairness of our lot, or fantasizing that things were different.

During the pandemic, many people were reminded of the “Serenity Prayer” which is recited at every 12-Step meeting: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." During the pandemic, people washed their hands, wore masks, and stayed indoors. But beyond that, worrying endlessly about millions of “what-ifs” only caused needless anxiety.

Taking it one step further, we can even adopt the Stoic philosophy and seek to find the silver lining in our negative experience. In fact, when observed deeply, we can almost always find something beneficial in even the most difficult circumstances. To use the pandemic example: Many people transformed it into an opportunity to take stock of all the things and people they were thankful for, to recommit themselves to a healthy diet and lifestyle, and to appreciate the gift of being alive.

This is called “perspective-taking” and can be a great ally in fighting anxiety.

To quote the Dalai Lama: “If a problem is fixable, then there is no need to worry. But if it’s not fixable, then worrying is not helpful.”

One final note on keeping your perspective when the world seems to be going off its rails: The more you cultivate a deep sense of purpose and a direction in your life, the less you will feel “thrown off” or victimized by outside events. So work on developing your “mission” in life, the thing you do that brings your passions and talents together, and gives you an overarching goal to achieve, be your best, and do good for those around you throughout your life. This, by the way, is what the ancient Greeks referred to as “Eudemonia”, their definition of happiness — which encompassed a sense of fulfillment, purpose, and living a meaningful life rather than just seeking fleeting pleasure. When you have a greater goal, it is easier to keep the minor daily road bumps in perspective.

The“5-4-3-2-1” grounding technique 

If we are lost in our ruminating, anxious thoughts, grounding techniques to bring our focus back to the present moment. The “5-4-3-2-1” technique involves identifying:

∙ 5 things you can see

∙ 4 things you can touch

∙ 3 things you can hear

∙ 2 things you can smell

∙ 1 thing you can taste

This technique is particularly useful for times when we are “disassociating”—a psychological term that means we are mentally drifting away from the hear-and-now. This technique can also be used to counter “derealization”, where we feel that the world around us is unreal, dreamlike, or distorted.

Find strength in your higher power

You can call upon your "higher power" to lessen anxiety, by engaging in spiritual practices like prayer, meditation, mindfulness, journaling, reading inspirational texts, or simply taking a moment to reflect on a sense of connection to something larger than yourself—which can provide a sense of peace and calm amidst anxious thoughts. 

Reciting meaningful Bible verses, or scriptures from other spiritual traditions, can be incredibly powerful in making us feel held, supported, loved, and strengthened.

Other ways you can incorporate your higher power include: 

∙ The power of prayer

Speak directly to your higher power, expressing your anxieties and asking for guidance, strength, or peace.

∙ Connect to nature

Spend time outdoors, appreciating the beauty of nature as a way to connect with a larger force. 

∙ Spiritual readings

Read religious texts or inspirational writings that resonate with you to find comfort and perspective. You can read a short passage and meditate on it, which is a particularly powerful way of internalizing it (this is actually a wonderful form of meditation many people do not know about called “passage meditation”).

Your daily anxiety-busting routine

Prepare your body/mind so that when anxiety hits, you’re already prepared to withstand it.

∙ A good day starts with good night’s sleep. Get to bed at a reasonable hour the night before—and try to get at least 7 or 8 hours in.

∙ Wake up early, so that you are not frantic, rushing, and running late.

∙ Exercise a half hour every day. Aerobics, yoga or weightlifting are great ways to work off stress, bring your heart rate down, get that feel-good dopamine pumping—and feel centered, yet energized for the day.

∙ Meditate: If you can squeeze in any meditation in the morning, it will set you up for the day with a greater sense of clarity and calm. A half-hour is ideal, but even five or ten minutes will help!

∙ Get sun in the morning: If you can get at least 20 minutes of sun, this will also generate dopamine to enhance your feeling of well-being.

∙ Watch what you eat: Be mindful of what you feed yourself throughout the day. And while coffee is a standard part of our routine, excessive caffeine can enhance anxiety and even panic.